Comments from Readers

Letters, comments and feedback from CURE readers. 

While I read your article, “Dating After Cancer,” with interest, I and many others like me have a different kind of dating problem which was not addressed.  What about those of us who are still constantly battling cancer with periodic treatments, surgery, hospital stays for severe side effects, etc., and who never know if we will be feeling well enough to even keep the first or next scheduled date? A new guy may not mind dating someone whose cancer is “in the past,” but may not feel that it is worth getting into a relationship with a chronically sick woman and may not want to even get to know someone whose current and future life will most likely always be cancer. I’d really like to know some ways to deal with this problem.  

Eileen Sheiman

Flushing, N.Y.

I got a lot out of the article on dating after cancer. After a bi-lateral mastectomy and scarring, I was a bit wary of when to lay it out there. Luckily, I'm very transparent, and it came out on our first date, and we did a toast to celebrate me being a survivor. I never expected someone to take it so well. I’m not sure if I could myself; after all, cancer is the word no one wants to hear.

Cancer doesn’t define who I am; it’s just a part of my history now.

Amy Witt

via Facebook

I am grateful for “Dating after Cancer.” After 10 months of multiple tests, pancreatic cancer was diagnosed. I underwent major surgery and am in my fourth week of chemotherapy. Dr. Sueann Mark is right about a positive attitude. Because we are energetic beings, another can pick up our feeling “timid, ashamed or nervous.”

There are enough surprises in the anatomy of a 68-year-old woman without springing an 8-inch scar, a conspicuous medication port bump, and a gloomy prognosis upon a younger lover. (Old guys are not able to keep up with me!)

Dolores Eckles

Charlotte, N.C.

Renée Twombly’s report on node surgery in the summer issue ("Node Removal Not Necessary in Some Patients") was so encouraging! In 2003, I was faced with the choice of getting an axillary lymph node dissection. Ironically, I viewed the cancerous lymph nodes as good...they had done their job to catch the stray cancer cells that were shedding from the tumor, and I could not see the benefit of removing the rest of the nodes. Seven years later, I have never regretted my decision. Thank you for bringing to light these mysterious little successes that continue to prove that gut instinct can be a good helmsman in these murky waters.  

Elizabeth Sylvia

Keene, N.H.

Thank you for the “Doorway to Healing” article. I battled leukemia during high school, and acting was my escape from the world. Art really does provide a creative outlet and time to forget current medical issues. 

Katie Vandrilla

Berlin, Conn.

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