Breast Cancer Survivor Reflects on 30 Years, Urges Informed Decisions

A two-time breast cancer survivor urges others to pause and make treatment decisions based on long-term wellbeing, not fear or medical pressure.

Thirty years ago, when I first heard the words, “You have breast cancer,” I never imagined I would still be here today to tell the story. I was just 40 years old at the time — young, full of plans and the mother of two growing boys. Now, approaching my 70th birthday, I realize I’ve lived nearly half my life with cancer. And with that time has come wisdom — hard-won, but worth sharing.

In the beginning, I was overwhelmed. There were so many decisions to make — quickly, it seemed. I wish someone had told me to pause. Breast cancer is not a medical emergency. You have time. I wish I had taken a breath and told myself, “You will survive this. You will see your sons grow into men. You will watch them graduate from high school, then college. You will dance at their weddings and hold your grandchildren in your lap.”

But I didn’t pause. In my rush, I trusted the process and followed advice that, in hindsight, wasn’t fully informed. A series of medical errors meant I never knew the actual size of my tumor. That critical piece of information got lost somewhere between appointments and assumptions. It wasn’t until after a lumpectomy and radiation that I discovered the mistake. By then, it was too late.

At the time, the medical trend was to “save the breast.” Lumpectomies were heavily promoted, and survival rates were presented as being equal to those of mastectomies. What wasn’t discussed as openly was what survival might look like twenty years down the road. The longer you live, the greater your risk of recurrence or, in my case, a second primary cancer.

I’m still surprised — shocked, really — that I let a surgeon talk me into a lumpectomy because a mastectomy would “ruin” her numbers. She was under pressure from the medical community and her peers to follow the trend — lumpectomy over mastectomy — since survival rates were said to be the same. But no one prepares you for how you’ll feel if cancer returns to that same breast, or worse, if a new primary emerges with a more aggressive personality and requires chemotherapy. No one talks about the emotional and physical toll of going through it all over again. Do you really want to face that a second time? Medical trends may shift with the years, but the consequences of your decisions stay with you for life.

Twenty-two years later, that’s exactly what happened. I was living abroad when I received the diagnosis: another tumor, this time in the same radiated breast. But this one was not a recurrence — it was a new cancer with a completely different personality. I often call it the “evil twin.”

This time, I made a different choice. I opted for a bilateral mastectomy with no reconstruction. It was the decision I wish I’d made the first time, but back then, I felt pressured and uninformed. I also chose adjuvant chemotherapy, and I did it all while navigating a foreign medical system in a Spanish-speaking country. It wasn’t easy, but it was right for me.

Now, I’m a two-time breast cancer survivor. I speak, write and advocate for others facing similar decisions. And the most important advice I give is this: You have time. Don’t let fear rush you. Don’t let anyone else’s agenda or bias dictate your path. Make the decision you will never regret. Make the one that aligns with the belief that you will live a long, vibrant life — one filled with purpose, love and unexpected blessings.

At nearly 70, I can say with confidence: I made the right decision the second time. And I have no regrets.

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