LiveSTRONG and reach for a dream


I've read recent articles about cancer survivorship and life after cancer. The discussions are about living and getting back to normal once cancer treatment ends. These stories have moved me to dream about a time when cancer will be a whisper of my past; the pause to imagine this thing called "life after cancer." For eight weeks, I've enjoyed the wonder of living without chemo. It has been like a dream and a welcome break with great reminders of what it is like to be cancer free. There have been few doctor visits and life as close to not having cancer as I can remember. Much like my treatment with SIR-Spheres, this break has given me time to appreciate each day. I've wakened to the giggles of a happy pre-schooler, enjoyed walks with Ronnie, swims in the pool and bedtime stories. I've ridden horses the past week or so, watched The Ghostriders practice drill, and had lunch with friends. I've cooked dinner without thinking about the food smells that permeate the air during treatment and have savored the snow cones and tall glasses of iced tea that aren't possible with oxaliplatin. I've driven past the exit to chemo without a second glance. I've grabbed every minute by the horns and I've taken the time to dream great dreams! "Nothing is as real as a dream. The world can change around you, but your dream will not. Responsibilities need not erase it. Duties need not obscure it. Because the dream is within you, no one can take it away." ~ Tom Clancy In these two months, I've again started thinking about winning the war on colon cancer. I never consciously stopped but the stark realization that a cure would not happen for me propelled me to wish for other things. I have dreamed of graduations, anniversaries and celebrations, ignoring the deep longing for a life without cancer. For me, normal includes embracing treatment and procedures that buy more time to LiveSTRONG in spite of colon cancer. Tomorrow is another day, and my car has to take that well-known path to treatment. I'll slide into a chemo chair that has been inhabited by other patients during my break; each believing in a treatment that will add extra days of life or better yet, provide a cure. As the magic potion drips into my body, I'll wish for the same. I'll even be bold and dream of what life would be like after cancer as I am reminded that every breath is not only filled with hope, but with a dream.With or without cancer, dreams should never breathe deep and reach for a dream!

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