Felicia Mitchell

Sometimes breast cancer invites us to look closely at our own bodies the way we might look at famous nudes. Creating visual art can be therapeutic, whether it involves photography or digital. Watercolors, sketches and collages could be empowering, too.

Even if being asymmetrical or flat is a valid choice for women who have undergone mastectomies, and that is how I usually feel best, there are no rules that say we should not wear a prosthetic bra now and then, or every single day, if it makes us smile or forget for a fleeting second that cancer can be disfiguring. There is no reason to feel self-conscious.

After radiation, as the skin heals, a compassionate dermatologist can help us to monitor any lingering side-effects.

What if prayers do not cure cancer every single time? No cancer patient or survivor should feel like a moral failure. Here are some suggestions from my experience to avoid hurting others with good intentions.

Cancer survivors need role models. Senator Mary Gordon Ellis (1890-1934) has inspired women in South Carolina for generations. Her ability to juggle cancer and life remains a beacon to all of us.

A complex fibroadenoma, even if it does not become cancerous, can correlate with a family history of breast cancer and an increased risk for cancer. Seeking more information from your doctors about how to proceed can offer peace of mind.

Keeping a journal during cancer treatment is great for perspective. While it can give you insights into symptoms as well as a record of treatments and reactions, it can also give you documented proof of how strong you can be, even years later.

Lymphedema requires diligence all seasons. Do not let icy cold weather catch you or your lymphedema, unaware. Take precautions to protect yourself.

Some cancer survivors are good at getting on with life. Some of us remain timid about the prospect of life, even when a prognosis is good. A new year is a good time to try harder to seize the day, whatever the future is likely to bring.

No-Shave November offers an opportunity for cancer awareness and fundraising. Contemplating whether to join in or not can bring back memories of when there was no choice but to go bald instead of letting our hair go wild.

The annual mammogram can be triggering for survivors. They could use a little more TLC from the system during this annual ritual.

Anniversaries in the calendar of cancer can be challenging. Make new memories to compete with the old.

Chemo brain affects each of us in different ways. Using our brains to negotiate a relationship with it is, ironically, the best way to forge ahead without despairing.

Survivors tend to find ways to trick themselves into feeling better, from “Look Good Feel Better” to prayer. Singing in the shower (or bathtub) has helped me. What strategies have you designed?

Summer fun can be a challenge for survivors with lymphedema. While you should do what your doctor, physical therapist and you have worked out as best for your needs, I share some of my helpful habits here.

When we are surviving cancer, when we want to see everybody else survive it too, another death is hard to take. When somebody passes, we are reminded of our own mortality—and distant losses—even as we mourn. Poetry helps.

Surviving cancer is great, but it does come with a cost: worry. I remind myself often, dealing with an ordinary challenge, that it is not always about the cancer. How do you maintain a good perspective?

As survivors, sometimes we step outside our comfort zones to help groups that raise awareness about cancer along with funds for research. Representing survivorship at a Relay for Life event can be as important as donating funds or decorating luminaries.

Watching current health care debates, we need to take deep breaths and trust that intelligent, compassionate people will make responsible choices affecting a nation. Writing letters to support our choices can help.

If being married is thought to affect how a person survives cancer, Valentine’s Day is a good time for single individuals to reflect on not only lost opportunities, but also the possibility of hope for more than gifts of chocolate.

While there is a difference between cancer and mundane medical crises, the mundane counts. Try to be holistic. Survive flu season as well as cancer. Practice wellness.

When my mother was given a teddy bear after her mastectomy, I was mystified. How could hugging a teddy bear help? When people started giving me doll figurines after my cancer diagnosis, I started to understand. Hope begins not just with medical intervention but also with the power of the imagination.

Routine checkups can rattle us with technology and subconscious fears that tiptoe to the surface, even five years out. Perhaps going alone to important screenings is not the best idea. Taking a friend if you do not have a partner, even if you can do it all alone, is never a bad idea.

In October, as we recognize Breast Cancer Awareness Month, let us not forget women with dementia. The mammogram, and related cancer treatment, can be controversial for elderly dementia patients. A care team will help with decision making. In my case, with my mother, we chose to follow-up on a very late diagnosis of breast cancer, with no regrets.

Sometimes I drive myself a little crazy wondering what I did to get breast cancer (even though I know logically why I likely did). I think too much. I am pretty sure I am not alone in this. Cancer survivors, including me, really should try to lose the Blame Game.

A cancer diagnosis can send people reeling. Who should you listen to as you decide the next step? Who should you ignore?

There are so many choices on the market to confuse us about healthy living. Let us be thankful that many products come with warning labels to alert us to potential cancer risks, even if they are sometimes so small we overlook them at first glance.

After a mastectomy, a woman is faced with many choices. My advice is to do what is most comfortable and healthful for you. The prosthetic bra, the asymmetrical or flattened chest, reconstruction—any of these choices should feel right if a woman listens to her own heart.

There are as many ways to write a bucket list as there are personalities. Goals can be practical or dreamy, lists long or short. Some bucket lists are like drill sergeants, others a soft voice whispering in your ear. If “write a bucket list” is on your bucket list, here are a few tips.

What is in your chemo tote? What should you give somebody who is getting ready to use one? Make a list, and check it twice.