How a Young Leukemia Survivor Learned to See Herself Again

Doctors had found cancer cells in her blood, and further testing confirmed a diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukemia (ALL). As 8-year-old Harper Harrell began treatment, much of the childhood she knew changed. Hospital stays separated her from her friends and pets, and concerns about infection limited whom she could see.

After doctors told her she would lose her hair, Harper struggled with how she might look. It was not until she saw herself in the mirror that she began to understand that her appearance did not change who she was.

In an interview with CURE, Harper discussed how cancer affected her confidence, the support that helped her through treatment and what she learned about herself along the way.

CURE: When you first learned you had cancer, what were some of the things you worried about most?

Harper: That day is still such a blur. My mom and I really don't remember much from that day.

One of the things I remember was coming back from the bathroom and seeing two doctors headed toward my hospital room. They came in and delivered the news.

We didn't get my final diagnosis until later because they had found cancer cells in my blood, but they needed further testing to figure out what type of cancer I had.

My questions were the hardest questions: "Am I going to die? Is my hair going to fall out? Am I never going to be able to see my friends again?"

They didn't have answers yet because they still needed to figure out what type of cancer I had.

CURE: How did losing your hair affect the way you felt about yourself?

Harper: One of my main concerns when I was diagnosed with cancer was what I would look like without hair.

They eventually told me that I would lose my hair, and I was so self-conscious for such a long time.

One day, I looked in the mirror and thought, "I am the same girl that I was weeks and weeks ago." I was no different.

Seeing the beauty in myself without hair was so hard, but finally realizing that I was beautiful without hair made things a lot easier.

I started figuring out how to style my outfits with a bald head. It was weird, but it was interesting, and it made me feel beautiful.

For some reason, I never thought I would be beautiful again after shaving my head. I was only 8 years old, but realizing that I was still the same girl was one of the best things.

CURE: Who helped you feel more comfortable and understand what was happening during treatment?

Harper: The child life specialists who helped me through everything were the biggest light.

Everyone explained what was happening, but the people who could really calm me down and explain things in kid terms were the child life specialists.

Knowing what was happening during such a difficult time was amazing. I'm so grateful to them, and they were one of the things that got me through treatment.

CURE: What helped you feel like yourself outside the hospital?

Harper: Animals always helped me. I had cancer during COVID, so I wasn't able to have therapy dogs come to my hospital room, which made me so sad.

Coming home to my dogs was something I always looked forward to. My dog Jimmy was a very big part of my treatment. Every time I came home from the hospital, he would be so excited to see me. Sometimes, when he knew I was sick, he would just lie with me and make sure I was OK.

I also started horseback riding during treatment, and I'm still doing it today. Looking forward to horseback riding every week was one of the biggest things for me because I got to connect with animals and learn new things outside of school.

Seeing my friends whenever I could was so much fun, too. Going back to school after almost a year was amazing.

CURE: How did the people around you help you through the difficult days?

Harper: They showed up in so many different ways.

Sometimes it was just texting me and checking up on me, asking if I was OK and what I needed. Whenever we needed something, people always showed up for us.

They started a meal train, and they supported my fundraising campaigns. My family and friends have always supported my love for childhood cancer awareness and research.

Having those people behind me, ready to support me whenever I needed them, was amazing.

CURE: Looking back, what did cancer teach you about yourself?

Harper: Finding my love for fundraising and advocacy for others was one of the best things that came out of my entire experience.

I'm still doing that today, advocating for people who are going through the same thing I went through and advocating for cancer research.

That's the thing I'm most grateful for coming out of this journey.

CURE: What would you tell another child who might be afraid of the changes that come with cancer treatment?

Harper: I always try to think about what I would have wanted someone to tell me because nobody around me really knew what childhood cancer was like.

From my perspective, I would say, "This is going to be a hard journey, but you have got this."

You have to push through and see the light at the end of the tunnel. You always have someone supporting you. You need to remember that, and don't give up. Don't ever give up.

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