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Clara Mae Cirk, a 30-year-old who was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer, opens up about her journey and using social media as an outlet to educate others.
Clara Mae Cirk opens up about her journey and using social media as an outlet to educate others.
Completing chemotherapy was an emotional milestone, marked by excitement, gratitude, and even frustration, according to Clara Mae Cirk, a 30-year-old woman who was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer.
Despite finishing chemotherapy, she says that the ongoing nature of immunotherapy makes it difficult to identify as a “survivor” and reconcile life after treatment. To cope, social media became a therapeutic outlet, leading to her “Questions with Clara” series, which educates others, shares personal experiences, and amplifies voices of those less comfortable speaking publicly.
Circk opens up about her cancer journey and using social media as an outlet to educate others in an interview with CURE.
You can follow Clara and her journey on TikTok and Instagram @C_Cirks. On these platforms, she openly answers questions about her diagnosis and treatment, shares updates on her condition, and creates a safe space for others with cancer to have an honest dialogue about their disease.
Circk: I did six rounds of chemo, and they didn't have a bell, so I was pretty bummed about that. The nurses all signed a certificate for me with their names, which was nice. I took a picture with the certificate, and then I got a video of me when they de-accessed my port for the last time for chemo. I was just like, “Yay!” That was exciting and emotional for me, because I had been looking forward to that day for so long. I had just had a 10-day hospital stay prior to that, so I was just excited to get it done and over with. Then I ended up back in the hospital after my last round of chemo, which was also kind of a bummer.
For me, it's hard because that day should have felt like the end of treatment. But since [I have] stage 4 disease, I will be on immunotherapy indefinitely, likely for the rest of my life. That is kind of difficult for me to wrap my head around, because I still have to go back to my cancer center and get the infusion, and still have my port accessed every three weeks. That’s kind of hard to balance “Am I done with treatment?” or “Does this qualify as treatment still, with immunotherapy forever?”
The word ‘survivor’ doesn't really resonate with me, honestly. I have a hard time using that word because I probably will never feel that sense of survivorship, I guess. It's hard for me to see other survivors. Everyone gets their hair back and they look normal; they kind of go back to reality. I feel like I'll never get there. That is overwhelming to me and upsetting and just a lot of emotions to work through, knowing that I'll probably never get back to my old self or my normal.
So, it's just a lot to wrap my head around.
I've always done this silly thing on my private Instagram story of talking to my followers and pretending I'm an influencer. I started doing it a long time ago and just kept it to my close friends list on Instagram. It was just a way for me to dump my feelings out, and it was very therapeutic for me just to sit on camera and talk about stuff.
When this all happened, I thought, "What better way to process everything than to just record myself and talk about stuff?" I got kind of tired of explaining everything to my friends and family, so it was just an educational way for me to say, “Hey, watch this video if you want to know what my treatment is right now, or what part of the process I'm in.” It was a much easier way to just send a link and explain things rather than retyping the same thing over and over. So, yeah, I think that's where it came from.
I also feel like I noticed a lot of people, once I was diagnosed, started connecting with me on social media. I noticed they were posting videos about their journey, and that really inspired me because I wanted to talk about my story and how that's different or the same or whatever. I saw all these people going to these conferences and stuff, and I want to do stuff like that, like public speaking engagements and different events and advocacy.
That’s what motivated me to start the series, too, because I want to get involved in stuff. I'm just finding that doing all that is more of my true purpose in life. I found it to be fulfilling to talk about my story and help others.
I want to be a voice for people who aren't as comfortable speaking up and talking. I know a lot of people are shy about sharing their experiences or what they've been through, especially when it involves uncomfortable topics that I sometimes cover in my questions. I know that not everybody feels great about talking about those things in a public space, so I don't mind doing it.
It always feels good when I get a comment like the one I got yesterday: "You were one of the first cancer creators I followed when I was diagnosed, and I've really enjoyed learning from you." That means a lot to me because the whole point is that if I can help just one person, it's worth it. So, it's impactful to me that somebody took the time to tell me that and express their appreciation.
I also think it's helpful when we, as cancer patients, share each other's Venmo or GoFundMe links and other resources. It helps get the word out there and supports a fellow patient.
Transcript has been edited for clarity and conciseness.
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