Choosing a Bra after a Mastectomy

Searching for the Right Post-Mastectomy Bra

Ever since my cat chewed up my favorite vintage bralette—the one that bridged my former body image with my new one—I have been searching for something comfortable that works for a woman who is okay with asymmetry after a unilateral mastectomy. For now, a sports bra does the trick. I'd rate it about a 7 out of 10, especially now that I've snipped off the band to create a looser fit. But with summer here and T-shirt season in full swing, I'm looking for a 10.

I know what I want. Reading ads, however, makes me feel like I should reach out to women adjusting to their new normal and offer a few tips for navigating the post-mastectomy bra market. That's because many ads—even from fitters we visit in person—try to shape our opinions through emotional appeals ("Buy this and you'll feel whole again" or beautiful), logical appeals (balance weight, accommodate asymmetry), or ethical appeals (enjoy our eco-friendly fabric). My advice is to quiet those messages and listen instead to your own body.

Your Body, Your Choice

Some marketing aimed at people after a mastectomy can unintentionally reinforce insecurities about unevenness, asymmetry, self-consciousness, or feeling less than "whole." Those emotional appeals can be counterproductive. We don't need overt—or even subtle—messages suggesting the only way to navigate a changing body image is to feel bad enough about it that we must fix it immediately with the right bra. Finding the right bra is a practical and deeply personal decision. While some people will want to create a balanced appearance with a prosthesis or reconstruction, others should feel equally comfortable choosing asymmetry or going flat.

As the saying goes, "You do you." Do whatever helps build your confidence. Look for shops that respect diverse body shapes and sizes, and for advertisements that feature models who actually look like us.

I love seeing ads that show the many ways a woman's chest can look after surgery, with bras designed for flat closures, unilateral mastectomies, or one or two prostheses. I am less fond of ads that promise I'll feel sexy or "whole" again. I am sexy. I am whole.

Comfort Over Expectations

Even without a prosthesis or implant, I feel whole. While I own both a prosthesis and a prosthetic bra, I've never felt comfortable being especially shapely—not even before my unilateral mastectomy. When I wear a prosthetic bra and see two distinct breasts in the mirror, I don't recognize myself. I may wear it for a special occasion, but most of the time I go out looking exactly as I look. I like looking like myself just as much as I value comfort.

Whether we choose a prosthetic bra or one designed for a flat or asymmetrical chest, our emotional needs matter just as much as our physical ones. When an advertisement tries to influence us by making us feel more self-conscious about asymmetry, some people may genuinely find comfort in buying that bra. For some, that's an important part of healing after a mastectomy. For others, it isn't. I simply want companies to respect the different ways we relate to our bodies and allow us to make those decisions for ourselves.

Imagining My Ideal Bra

Here's an ad I wrote for fun to imagine my ideal bra:

"Enjoy wearing a stretchy yet supportive whisper of a post-mastectomy bra with adjustable straps. Unbanded. Nylon with viscose lining. No pockets. Available in black, white, and mauve."

It's intentionally a little vague. It doesn't mention that I want gentle support on one side and soothing comfort for remaining tissue on the other, but it's a good place to start as I explore what works best for me. Maybe writing your own "perfect bra" advertisement, based on your values and your needs, will help you find your own perfect 10.

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