Growing old is empowering

Get up. Get ready. Go. Life moved in a routine that was fast and furious before cancer. Time never allowed for moments to really stand still, free and easy, just to enjoy. We were too busy planning for the rest of our lives when colon cancer, like a thief in the night, stole our perceived certainty of the future. At 31, we put our dreams on hold. We mourned the fact that I would die. We slowed our pace and began to savor each day.During this decade and a half of dancing with cancer, I have experienced a future that I once thought had been snatched by colon cancer. Instead, I've gladly joined the ranks of a growing population of long-term advanced cancer survivors. With increased cancer research and the development of new therapies (now 10 available for colon cancer where once there was only one) and treatments (like Cyberknife, RFA, SIR-Spheres and the list goes on), we are creating our own survival statistics. It hasn't happened overnight, but instead with the slow and steady ticking of the clock that culminates in so many rich experiences. Life and death, grief and joy, sadness and happiness, trial and tribulation. It's hard to reminisce these past 15 birthdays with cancer and to fully absorb all that has happened in this time. I barely remember life without cancer but know that many of my most treasured memories have been held more tight and dear because of it. The age of time seems to tell only the number of years I have lived but little about the milestones and memories made along the way. Age shares not the number of cherished memories: together times picking blackberries, walking in the morning dew, of the heavenly smell of honeysuckle or the crunch of autumn leaves beneath our feet. It doesn't embody the milestones hastened by cancer or the rush to slow down and simply grab the muchness of now. Aging in spite of cancer does, however, provide the wisdom that borrowed time is indeed a splendid gift. The need to "get up, get ready, and go" has long been forgotten; consciously replaced with the power of "holding fast, hugging often, and hoping always." Here I am, celebrating 47 years of life and feeling that growing old - if you consider 47 old - is empowering.Suzanne Lindley has been living with metastatic colorectal cancer since 1998. She is the founder of YES! Beat Liver Tumors, an organization for individuals living with metastatic liver tumors, and an advocate for Fight Colorectal Cancer.