Can Cancer Be a Gift?

After doing some yard landscaping, I began to have some rather severe back pain and muscle spasms. My first thought was to visit a chiropractor and see if adjustments would help the situation. I also signed up for weekly massages to help with the muscle tightness. After a few months, these treatments were not working, and I then decided to visit my GP. He said that he would prescribe muscle relaxers and to come back in a few weeks if they did not help. Something told me to ask him to measure my PSA, which he did. Two days later he called me at home and told me that my lab results showed a PSA of 1488 and that I needed to see a urologist right away.

I decided to make both a urologist and oncologist appointment, both who came highly recommended by my chiropractor. My meeting with my urologist led me to see a surgeon who performed a biopsy on a small mass that had presented itself rather quickly on my left waist. The results showed that I indeed had prostate cancer. The urologist also ordered a PT scan and the results were ready when I had my first oncology visit. We both looked at them and my back looked like a lit-up Christmas tree. He said that this was very serious and told me that I had stage 4 prostate cancer that had metastasized into cancerous lesions on my bones from the pelvic area up through my spine and the base of my skull. He went on to say, "We need to throw everything at it."

My therapy began two weeks later and consisted of chemotherapy, hormone injection, daily hormone medication and a non-chemo drip to help strengthen my bones.

My immediate emotional reaction was that of anger. After all, I had always taken good care of myself my entire adult life, healthy eating habits, working out at the gym five days a week. I fell into the "why me," and sat with that emotion for several days. Finally, both myself and my husband decided that we knew very little about my cancer, the treatment plan and how effective it would be. We decided to move forward with a more positive attitude and to focus on the things that I could do to promote my health. After all, that’s how we've have always lived.

One year after treatment began, my PSA dropped to 0.01 and my bone density had a 27% increase over the original scan. I also had genetic testing done and it confirmed that I had the CHEK2 gene. I knew that I carried it as my oldest daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer and she had genetic testing done, which confirmed she had the gene. Both her sister and her mother both tested negative, and therefore it came from me.

During that first year I learned to lean heavily on Tim. We have been together 28 years and married legally for 10 years. He quickly became my caregiver and helped me through the difficult times I was having both physically and emotionally. We were also surrounded by a very loving and supportive family and group of core friends. They would all show up in different ways, some had my treatment schedule on their calendars and would call to check in, others would bring meals to us to give Tim a break and just came to visit. At the beginning of my treatment, I decided to journal my experience, which morphed into a book that I published on Amazon, titled "My Dance with Cancer."

It has now been 20 months since I was diagnosed and my PSA remains at 0.01. My cancerous bone lesions are not curable but they are treatable. The reason I titled this story "Is Cancer a Gift?" is I believe it can be — as I have shifted from fear and anxiety to that of being active and engaged with the diagnosis. I have also shifted from patient to advocate. I have spoken at two major conferences, telling my story. I have done a podcast with a local cancer foundation, with several more to come, and I have joined the board of another local cancer foundation. I am also working my second book.

The data says that I have a life expectancy of three to five years. Based on my overall health and treatment results, my oncologist says that he has a few other patients that present themself like myself and he is still treating them 10 years later; I plan to go beyond that. The wild card is the CHEK2 gene.

My advice to men with prostate cancer is to not be afraid to share your emotions. It can be such a major support that you can receive outside of treatment. Also, be your own advocate, make sure you find the right medical team and learn all that you can from them. Take care of yourself by eating healthy and getting exercise, even if it’s just a walk every day. Lean on your faith and be positive, you can beat the odds.

This piece reflects the author’s personal experience and perspective. For medical advice, please consult your health care provider.

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