Renewal and Healing from Testicular Cancer This May

Brian Sluga is now a testicular cancer survivor after receiving the diagnosis when he was 20 years old. Catch up on Brian's blogs here!

If you are anything like me, your heart from time to time has been a little unsteady.

I worry, let noise in, and am not grounded. So, I have been trying to keep out the static and bad vibes. To make things better, I carry my iPhone with me to record all real moments and small wonders. It helps to remember that there are a great number of things to be thankful for in my life.

The little things like a smile from a stranger remind me that there are big rewards if we just try to find them. Our journey is different from others. Some are fighting cancer, leukemia, mental health issues, or other health matters. Well, writing about cancer has been rewarding and hopefully helping a few people on their own journey.

There is so much in the world that I appreciate right now. I am glad to be here, and you are here reading this. I am glad we get to share this space, even in this small way.

In the early days of my diagnosis, my moods changed daily, sometimes hourly.

I felt deep anguish about my cancer diagnosis. Why and how did this happen? One’s mood is very connected to their thoughts and actions. A depressing thought can trigger a bad mood.

My mood most days after my cancer discovery was very erratic and caused unrecognizable behavior at times. What I learned is that just because something bad happens does not mean I am bad or need to behave similarly. I had to learn to focus on my future healthy self to keep me from being a total ogre to live with.

I have learned to examine my life by listening to my thoughts and then act in a way to drive me closer to the person I want to be. So, as we grow and approach Springtime, think about how the Winter frost is thawing and your senses awaken. All your emotions may unfold in the new season. They can paint a landscape with vibrant hues of Spring.

With the arrival of spring brings feelings of hope. A renewal in a way that both challenges and exhilarates us. Your mood may mirror this new beginning. Will it be a mood of nervousness, anticipation, or a “Wait for the blooms” sort of mood? How will your mood dictate your behavior? Is that behavior cohesive with the future you want?

Consider the weather and how much it will affect your overall mood.

Rainy, overcast days can evoke feelings of sadness and depression. Sunny spring days may bring neighbors outside, and we can see flowers bloom, trees budding, and hear birds chirping, which launches us into a better mood.

After my cancer, I had my mental limits. Often my mental limits were within my comfort zone. With my life now in a healthier state, I do not let fear rule my days. I have learned not to let my mood push me off course. A bad or sour mood can easily grow into your entire disposition and corrupt your life.

In every aspect of my life, mood plays a major role. When I start something new, my “go-to” mood is my energetic mood. Those are days when I just let my mind wander with delight. The great thing about life is that you can self-reflect on yourself.

Years after my cancer, I felt constant anguish of always being on and needing to perform. As ideas grew like weeds in my head, everything felt like I was drowning in quicksand.

My only regrets are the many late-night parties, hangovers, and bad dating experiences. What cancer did take away from me was those early college years. Because of so many routine follow-up tests and doctors’ appointments, my mind was preoccupied and not ready to go back to school after the surgery.

It took me several years to get back and focused on studies and what was profoundly important. I regret not pushing forward more quickly. Changing my major five times was something I did. I am happy about that now. It opened my mind to what I really wanted to do as a young person with many interests and aspirations.

I decided to give in and take God’s hand for a moment. I did not know what to expect, but I desperately wanted to live. My mood was erratic, a persistent emotional state during that time. It influenced my life as my story progressed. One must not let an erratic or bad mood in as it will change the atmosphere of your well-being.

Do not let bad emotional moods get in the way of your life. The challenges of both our personal and professional lives can be overwhelming, but you can invite peace in your life and positivity in your heart. God’s blessings for Spring healing and renewal this year await us all. Here is to a healthy and happy Spring 2025.

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