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CURE spoke with an expert about the needs of children in families living with cancer during back-to-school season.
CURE spoke with an expert about the needs of children in families living with cancer during back-to-school season.
For children in families that are impacted by cancer, returning to school can present its own unique set of challenges, as an expert explained to CURE.
CURE sat down with Kori Hatfield, who is the outpatient social work supervisor at Moffitt Cancer Center in Tampa, Florida, to discuss back to school season and how it impacts children as they are dealing with a cancer diagnosis in their family.
Hatfield: Cancer doesn't happen in a vacuum. It has impacts on everything from finances and scheduling to dealing with treatment side effects, managing doctor's appointments, and handling unexpected hospitalizations. These are all things that are already challenging.
When you add the back-to-school season, there's a significant transition with new schedules, as well as children dealing with new peers and new teachers. This introduces a whole new support system for them to get used to, along with new requirements for schoolwork and homework.
As a result, schedules are thrown off even more. It's kind of the perfect storm of a lot of significant transitions all coming together, which can greatly impact families and kids.
Routines are very important for children. Kids have all the same emotions that we do but haven't yet learned how to manage them. As a result, they can have anticipatory anxieties, fears, or worries based on small pieces of information or different changes. Having a routine helps to build some consistency in a world that is often unpredictable. It gives them a sense of security and safety, knowing what's coming next and what to expect.
That's where routines can be very helpful, both at home and at school. It's also important to continue fostering existing connections, whether that be with family or friends, and to keep being a part of after-school activities or events if families are able to. I know finances play a big role in that, but keeping that routine can help maintain consistency and provide guideposts along the way for children.
That can be very important. The term “transparency” can vary from family to family, as a family's culture or larger cultural background might not lend itself to speaking with people outside the family about personal health issues or other family matters. While the level of transparency may vary, if the school knows about a cancer diagnosis and has some context about what's happening at home, they can better support the child while they are there. Since kids spend most of their time at school, this information can help the school understand any changes that might occur in terms of attendance or drop-off and pickup routines.
It can also help them understand any changes in the child's behavior. If a child is suddenly acting out, or is withdrawn, or having a rough day, the school will have some context for what might be happening and where those feelings might be coming from. This allows them to support the child with empathy and an open mind instead of immediately leading with punishment. They can approach the conversation with a sense of curiosity about what's going on and how it might be impacting the child. This can also help them connect the child to available school supports, such as social workers, to provide additional resources at school.
There are quite a few resources available for families, and they depend on the specific needs at the school. Specifically, most schools typically have a school social worker or a school counselor who can support families. Additionally, coaches or special teachers can always be a layer of support.
Every school and school district might have different types of resources available. However, there are often many community organizations and churches that hold school drives where you can get free back-to-school supplies, haircuts, and immunizations if needed. Some schools also have additional support for families going through a difficult time, but this is specific to the school district.
There is also support in the community from organizations that understand the impact of a parent's cancer diagnosis on children and families. These organizations may offer support groups and other resources for children.
One of the things we haven't discussed is talking to your children about your cancer diagnosis. As parents, we inherently want to protect our children from difficult things. This is one of those hard things that isn't easy to protect them from, so it's important to lean into the discomfort of having these challenging conversations.
Letting your child know that you have a cancer diagnosis, what the treatment will look like, and how it will impact their daily lives can help provide context for potential disruptions to their routines. This might involve other family members helping with transportation or homework. When a child knows what's going on, it helps them understand these disruptions and changes in their own routine.
As we talked about before, children have all the same emotions that we do. Kids can have anticipatory anxiety if they don't know what's going on, especially when they can tell that their parents are stressed, or they overhear things about doctor's appointments. As they try to put the pieces of the puzzle together, they might unintentionally create their own answers. Young children, especially, can have "magical thinking," where they might believe they are the reason their parents are upset or that they caused their parent's cancer.
By letting them know about the cancer diagnosis, the treatment plan, the potential side effects, and the changes to their routine, you can also reinforce that they did nothing to cause this. You can explain that cancer is not something you can catch from your parent and that it's not something your parent did or caught from anyone else—it's nobody's fault. This kind of reassurance helps provide comfort to the child within the home.
Transcript has been edited for clarity and conciseness.
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