Shining a Spotlight on Pinups4Cancer

It’s mid-August and I’m feeling frumpy. Fine lines I hadn’t noticed before are appearing on my face. My hair has a few more of those “silver highlights.” Nothing a little makeup and hairstyling can’t remedy. I’ve recently turned 50 years old, a milestone I wasn’t sure I would have the privilege to reach after being diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer when I was 38.

While mindlessly scrolling through my Facebook feed, I noticed there were already signs of pinkwashing and what was to come in October for Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Sandwiched between all the usual online chatter was a post with the most adorable vintage graphics that caught my eye in the California Breast Cancer Support Group. It was a Pinups4Cancer Survivor Pinup Shoot invitation. I’ve always loved the retro pinup style, so I jumped at the chance to register for this event and become a pinup doll for the day.

Pinups4Cancer is a non-profit organization providing empowerment through vintage glamour photo shoots. They also create an annual calendar out of some of the images captured at their shoots. The talented teams are made up of makeup artists, photographers, hairstylists and even classic car owners who generously donate their time, skills and creativity.

While anxiously awaiting to hear if I’d been selected, my mind was busy curating outfit possibilities. With my lifelong love of vintage, I already had plenty of options to shop from in my own closet. And, of course, I’ll never pass up an excuse to go thrifting for more. When I found out I’d secured a spot, it was time to get busy gathering up clothing, shoes, and accessories that fit the themes planned for the October shoot.

Living with metastatic breast cancer brings mixed emotions when it comes to Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I struggle with the pink celebrations while dealing with a treatable, yet incurable cancer. Being chosen for this photo shoot gave me something to look forward to in what can otherwise be a challenging month focused on awareness of a disease I am all too aware of.

When I arrived at the beautiful hillside home that was being used for the photo shoot, I was immediately ushered into the makeup chair. There was so much happening all around me, I barely had time to take it all in. I’m still processing it all. As my makeup artist was expertly applying false eyelashes, a memory was bubbling to the surface. It was my late sister’s wedding day. We were in a hotel room getting ready for the ceremony, and we were running behind. My sister had just finished having her makeup done, and she absolutely hated the eyelashes. In tears, she immediately locked herself in the bathroom to remove them. The bridesmaids, the makeup artist, and I were trying to convince my sister to come out of the bathroom so her makeup could be fixed. Sitting in that makeup chair having lashes applied brought tears to my eyes. Even though it has been nearly three years since her tragic death, I am still struggling with grief.

My makeup artist, who specialized in brides, came prepared for emotional moments like this. She quickly pulled out a tiny bedazzled portable fan and Q-Tips to dry my welling eyes and gave me a big hug. There was no way I was going to ruin those glamorous lashes.

Sitting across from me, having her own makeup done was another gorgeous survivor doll, who coincidentally happened to share my late sister’s name. In that time and space, I felt my sister’s presence there with me in my memories as I stepped into a world of beauty, glamour and vintage charm for the day, focusing on the beauty of being alive.

From the pinup style makeup, hair and wig styling to pose coaching, photographers, a DJ and a caterer, every detail of the day was thoughtfully planned, complete with goodie bags to take home. As the cameras captured these moments in time and the music played poolside, I felt radiant, confident with the help of the phenomenal pose coach, and deeply grateful for this opportunity.

Audrey Hepburn said it best. “For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.” With heartfelt thanks to all of the committee members, volunteers and participants at Pinups4Cancer who made this day possible and unforgettable.

Shine on, dolls!

This piece reflects the author’s personal experience and perspective. For medical advice, please consult your health care provider.

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